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If you keep your head cool and look at this relationship calmly and rationally, you will see that it may not last forever, even though you may want it to. And then all of this stuff about sexual histories will seem kind of silly in retrospect.

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On the other hand, if they start feeling guilty about their past, then they didn’t deserve the beating you gave them.

They’re a person who really wants to make you happy and to be with you, and you feel bad for hurting them over something they can’t control now.

Secretly, your anger won’t be satisfied until you’ve brought them around to your way of thinking and shamed them for the times they stepped away from it. In fact, they their past, or your plan will work and they will feel really horrible about it. If they start defending their past, it’s going to push the two of you farther apart.

Their sudden righteous anger will turn your virginity into something that you’re holding over their head; they’ll stop valuing it and respecting you for it as much.

As a somebody who is waiting till marriage, you’ve got a lot of pressure on you to find “the one”, so you’re going to have a tendency to try to push every relationship that way.

That’s when issues like those mentioned above are going to come into play.

Ultimately, you may be happiest with somebody who has a sexual history that is at least on the conservative side. There is such a thing as other factors out-weighing the sexual history factor (like the fact that they’re crazy about you and complete you in every other way…that does happen).

You can throw everything else on this list away if you don’t marry the person. The sole purpose of pre-marriage relationships are personal growth and companionship. Don’t blow what may end up just being some good fun by trying to take it too seriously too fast.

I’m sorry for being so snippy.” Approach the discussion as if this was completely your problem, not theirs…. And now you’ve got only a faceless sea of everyone else to potentially date.

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